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James Potter doesn't want to talk about it. ([info]jamesopotter) wrote,
@ 2009-08-15 12:04:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Warded to the Lily.

We need to talk. Really talk. I'm so sorry love. I am so sorry. It was like... a switch or something that had been flipped. I know I shouldn't have run off as soon as we got to Andie's but I needed to beat the shit out of Gaius to see that I was fixed. And I realized that I am.

I'm at that old house on my parent's property that we never used. It's well warded but if you want to come back to Andie's I will. I left-- I dropped Sirius's ashes in the field trying to get to you, and I lost my dad's pocket watch too. Thought about going to try and find them but I don't want to be stupid. I never want to lose you again.

And I want to hold Harry. I can't believe we have a son.

Private to the Order minus Remus.

I know that no one's going to trust me anytime soon, but I'm back, I swear. I can't even begin to say how sorry I am, but I will swear it on my life that I never game them any names or information. Right now I'll stay away from everyone till we can figure out some way to make sure I'm harmless. You can give me veritaserum if you want or anything.

I've got information though I'd like to get passed around. I know the rehabilitation centre in and out, and my uncle's house as well. Whatever I can help with, let me know, and for fuck's sake it needs to be said... I've missed being me.

Private to Severus.

I'm out.

Private to Sirius.

I lost your ashes. If they aren't floating around in the wind somehow I'll figure out a way to get them back.

I miss you. But I'm better now, and I think that's probably what you'd have really wanted. Wish you could be here.


(Post a new comment)

Order.
[info]smuggles
2009-08-15 04:24 pm UTC (link)
Welcome back, boyo.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Order.
[info]jamesopotter
2009-08-15 07:16 pm UTC (link)
S'good to be back. Confusing, but good.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

James.
[info]fortiscadere
2009-08-15 05:37 pm UTC (link)
Good.

Are you sane?

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Severus.
[info]jamesopotter
2009-08-15 07:17 pm UTC (link)
I think so. Mostly anyway. It's not like they ever did anything to me that would've made me otherwise... just confused me. Took what I knew and twisted it, but I think I'm betterish now.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

James
[info]fortiscadere
2009-08-15 07:37 pm UTC (link)
Confusion can be as dangerous as outright belief in something - possibly more so. They're good at doing that though.

I'm a halblood, are you a better wizard than I am?



(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Severus.
[info]jamesopotter
2009-08-15 07:51 pm UTC (link)
Oh come on, that's not a fair question. I'd have said yes from first year on!

But...

No. The answer is, I'm probably not. Should have practiced more in school and been less of a ponce.

What does that mean? Normal or brainwashed?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

James.
[info]fortiscadere
2009-08-15 07:57 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, but you'd have been wrong from first year on too.



I... don't know. It doesn't seem normal, but it doesn't seem brainwashed either. Then again I'm not certain when the last time was that I had a 'normal' conversation with you. Are we getting old and mature or some such shit?

Also, you're not wrong about needing to be less of a ponce at school.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Severus. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-15 08:06 pm UTC
James. - [info]fortiscadere, 2009-08-15 08:10 pm UTC
Severus. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-15 08:13 pm UTC
James. - [info]fortiscadere, 2009-08-15 08:17 pm UTC
Severus. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-15 08:22 pm UTC
James. - [info]fortiscadere, 2009-08-15 08:24 pm UTC
Severus. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-15 08:27 pm UTC
James. - [info]fortiscadere, 2009-08-15 08:34 pm UTC
James. - [info]fortiscadere, 2009-08-15 08:35 pm UTC
Order.
[info]spelldamage
2009-08-15 05:42 pm UTC (link)
Can I come see you later today James?

And welcome back.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Order.
[info]jamesopotter
2009-08-15 07:18 pm UTC (link)
If it's alright with Andie if I go over there, then yeah. It's fine with me.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Order.
[info]spelldamage
2009-08-15 07:45 pm UTC (link)
I'll let her answer for that, but I think that would be a good thing right now.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Order minus Remus.
[info]jamesopotter
2009-08-15 07:53 pm UTC (link)
I was invited once, but if it's a problem you can name somewhere else. I know some safeish places, but again, if I were you, I wouldn't trust me. And there are definitely some people in the Order I want staying the far fuck away from me.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Order minus Remus.
[info]spelldamage
2009-08-15 08:00 pm UTC (link)
Right. Well I'll see what Andie says and then we'll figure something out. I'd like to do a thorough examination and Hestia may as well.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Order minus Remus. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-15 08:07 pm UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]spelldamage, 2009-08-15 08:10 pm UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-15 08:11 pm UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]spelldamage, 2009-08-15 08:13 pm UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-15 08:16 pm UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]spelldamage, 2009-08-15 08:21 pm UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]lostnowfound, 2009-08-15 10:30 pm UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]hippocratically, 2009-08-15 08:18 pm UTC
Hestia. - [info]spelldamage, 2009-08-15 08:20 pm UTC
Beth. - [info]hippocratically, 2009-08-15 09:09 pm UTC
Hestia. - [info]spelldamage, 2009-08-15 09:24 pm UTC
Beth. - [info]hippocratically, 2009-08-15 11:37 pm UTC
Hestia. - [info]spelldamage, 2009-08-16 01:55 am UTC
Beth. - [info]hippocratically, 2009-08-16 02:45 am UTC
Hestia. - [info]spelldamage, 2009-08-16 03:05 am UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-15 08:24 pm UTC
Order minus Remus. - [info]hippocratically, 2009-08-15 09:11 pm UTC
Order minus Remus.
[info]lostnowfound
2009-08-15 10:28 pm UTC (link)
Yes, of course, dear. You're welcome to stay as long as you'd like. Alastor's reinforced our wards, so it should be safe for the time being.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

Order minus James
[info]patticakes
2009-08-15 05:51 pm UTC (link)
We can't be sure and we can't trust any information he's offering us.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Order minus James
[info]spelldamage
2009-08-15 07:46 pm UTC (link)
There has to be some way we can figure out if he's genuine or not.

If he's genuine the information could be really useful in trying to get everyone else out.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Order minus James
[info]patticakes
2009-08-16 01:50 am UTC (link)
Veritaserum, like he said, but we'd have to get some, and that's assuming he dosn't have the antidote ready. Otherwise I don't think there's any way to be completely sure if he's genuine. Lily would be able to tell best but we still have to be careful.

We can use him either way, I think, but we can't take too many more risks.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Order minus James
[info]spelldamage
2009-08-16 02:04 am UTC (link)
Considering that we haven't always been able to tell who is trustworthy and who is not, I don't think we should discount him being genuine. That doesn't mean we should take unnecessary risks, or anything. Lily would know best, and we should make certain things check out, but some of the information might be helpful to have to begin with, I guess.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Order minus James
[info]patticakes
2009-08-16 02:47 am UTC (link)
Considering that we haven't always been able to tell who is trustworthy, we should be doubly vigilant with someone we know is a bigger risk.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

Order minus James
[info]sapience
2009-08-15 11:19 pm UTC (link)
You're right. We can't trust him. Not yet. Perhaps not ever again.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Order minus James
[info]patticakes
2009-08-16 01:50 am UTC (link)
He can still be useful though.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

James.
[info]persisting
2009-08-16 01:55 am UTC (link)
I'm sorry you lost them. We'll get them back.

I'll suggest that. The veritaserum. I don't know if we have any, I'll find out. I don't know what's going on right now.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Lily.
[info]jamesopotter
2009-08-16 11:52 pm UTC (link)
I don't care what's going on right now to be perfectly honest. What I care about is you and Harry. I know that this is fast and you can say no-- but this house is warded as well as any place I've ever warded before short of a Fidelius.

It's not fancy or put together well or anything, but why maybe you and Harry could come spend the night?

Not for-- I mean, for some reason that sounded like I was talking about sex and OF COURSE I am not in any way, and only talking about us talking and me missing you. But if you say no I'll go to Andie's. Whatever you want. Absolutely anything you want.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

James.
[info]persisting
2009-08-16 11:59 pm UTC (link)
James, Remus is dead.




You were right. About that part at least. I didn't

I'm sorry I didn't-

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Lils.
[info]jamesopotter
2009-08-17 12:02 am UTC (link)
He's dead?



Fuck.

I knew I wasn't crazy. I'm sorry, I know you still trusted him, but he's the one that took me to the centre and I was afraid to tell because I knew he'd try to cover it up and then I told Sirius, and the next day he was DEAD. Marlene must have suspected... I'm just so glad he didn't hurt you.

Will you come over? Maybe we can talk about the good times. I miss the good times.


(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

James. - [info]persisting, 2009-08-17 12:13 am UTC
Lily. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-17 12:22 am UTC
James. - [info]persisting, 2009-08-17 12:37 am UTC
Lils. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-17 12:43 am UTC
James. - [info]persisting, 2009-08-17 12:55 am UTC
Lils. - [info]jamesopotter, 2009-08-17 12:58 am UTC
James. - [info]persisting, 2009-08-17 01:00 am UTC
James
[info]lostnowfound
2009-08-17 01:49 am UTC (link)
I'm so glad you're back, James. I know they must have done so much to you please, let me know if there's anything more I can do.
Have you heard? About the werewolf Remus?

(Reply to this)



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