InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Stop making that big face!"

James Potter doesn't want to talk about it. (jamesopotter) wrote,
@ 2009-08-04 20:08:00

Private to Sirius.

You just couldn't leave well enough alone you big twat. I cam home from seeing Harry, cutest little bugger on the planet, and get your damned letter and now I'm sobbing like a third year whose just lost her virginity to Sirius Black and found out he doesn't really love her and only said it to get in her panties, and what the fuck am I supposed to do now?

What do you want from me Pads? Remus took me in! I know something is going on. But you were right about so much and you're my best friend and you always will be, and I believe you and I don't know what to think.

This would be so much easier if you were here. Why did you have to leave me?

Private to the Order.

I don't want to do this but Sirius was my best friend and so I am fulfilling his last wishes. So I need to ask you for his body. If you don't trust me with his body then it should go to Andie and she can take care of the first part of this. He wanted to be cremated and then he wanted me to have his ashes and spread them.

I loved him like a brother, I would never do anything to dishonour his memory. Please let me do this without picking any fights.

Also, he doesn't want a funeral, he wants a party. And obviously, I doubt I'll be invited but I can owl money for alcohol if you need it. He also wants this music played:

Children of the Revolution. Good ol’ T-Rex

Last, he wanted me to have Shadow. I want it for now but it's going to go to Harry when he gets old enough to ride without killing himself. I think that's all.

(Post a new comment)

	Order, minus James. moonstricken 2009-08-05 12:21 am UTC (link)
	Sirius' motorbike, Shadow, is parked a block or so away from the safehouse, if someone can pass on the message. (Reply to this)

	Order, plus James. patticakes 2009-08-05 12:25 am UTC (link)
	Shadow is parked a block or so away from the safehouse. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Order, plus James. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 12:28 am UTC (link)
	Thank you. And-- Just in case there was any doubt, I heard Uncle Charlus talking about you over dinner last night and I never told. They never asked for names, and even if they had, I wouldn't have given them up. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Order, plus James. patticakes 2009-08-05 12:33 am UTC (link)
	Well, thank you, though I'm sure you can understand why it's a little difficult to know whether or not to believe you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Order, plus James. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 12:36 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, I can, but I still wanted it out there. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	James, Patty, Sturgis patticakes 2009-08-05 12:51 am UTC (link)
	We'll be able to believe you when we find out who it was. Your buddy Travers probably knows. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	James, Patty, Sturgis jamesopotter 2009-08-05 12:54 am UTC (link)
	I'm not going to have this argument right now. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	James, Patty, Sturgis patticakes 2009-08-05 01:03 am UTC (link)
	It was only a statement. Now excuse me, I need a nap because I'm still feeling pretty rotten after almost being blasted into nothing but a carpet stain yesterday. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	Order, plus James. scantron 2009-08-05 12:33 am UTC (link)
	Do you know who did? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Order, plus James. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 12:36 am UTC (link)
	I know who gave them my location. Whether or not Pete gave you guys up I'm not sure. I'm gonna see him tonight but they might be watching so I can't exactly ask. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Order, plus James. scantron 2009-08-05 12:39 am UTC (link)
	Pettigrew. Alright. Nah, it doesn't matter now. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Order, plus James. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 12:40 am UTC (link)
	It could have easily been Abe or Tabby too. I mean, as far as I know, Pete gave up all his information ages ago and it seems like having a spy in the Ministry is something they'd have hopped on, yeah? (Reply to this) (Parent)

	James. hippocratically 2009-08-05 01:17 am UTC (link)
	I think he would've wanted you there. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Hestia. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 01:21 am UTC (link)
	I know he would have wanted me there. But it can't happen. If he wanted me there so badly he should have stuck around and dragged me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	James. hippocratically 2009-08-05 01:36 am UTC (link)
	He was really excited, you know, about you coming back for his birthday. I haven't seen him that excited in a really long time. He really loved you. ~~I don't know ho~~ Can I tell you something? I don't know who else to tell. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Hestia. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 01:45 am UTC (link)
	Thanks. It's good to know. And yeah... you can. I won't tell. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	James. hippocratically 2009-08-05 01:58 am UTC (link)
	He sent me a letter...you know, one of those "so now that I'm dead" letters, and he told me some things that made me really...I don't know, kind of more afraid, if it makes sense. I don't know if it does make sense, everything's kind of been upside-down since Sunday. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Hestia. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 02:00 am UTC (link)
	Surprisingly enough he didn't let me read the letter so you'll have to give me more to go on than just that. What'd he say? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

James.

hippocratically
2009-08-05 02:31 am UTC (link)

Sorry, I'm still trying to sort it out myself. I don't know how to say it without it sounding like a breach of trust, but it wasn't because he was telling me these things because he was worried, about both of us I think.

He told me some of the things that you'd been telling him the past couple of weeks, and it all sounds a lot worse than what I'd thought just reading what you were writing publically. (and again, I don't mean for this to be a breach of trust...I know that he just wanted the best for you, because he loved you and I loved him and so I want the best for you too, and that doesn't even make any sense, but then, nothing does)

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Hestia. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 02:34 am UTC (link)
	I don't I don't know what to say to that. I wasn't I didn't know he would tell anyone. You can't say anything. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	James. hippocratically 2009-08-05 02:44 am UTC (link)
	I'm not. I swear to you, I'm not telling anyone. I think the only reason he told me was because he knew you were afraid and he wanted me to make sure that you had someone you could trust. I know I'm not him, and I don't want to try to replace him because Helga knows I can't, but if the things he told me are true... (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Hestia. jamesopotter 2009-08-05 02:59 am UTC (link)
	Things are fine right now. I can't say much else, but they're fine. Sometimes Sirius would exaggerate stuff. That's all. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	James. hippocratically 2009-08-05 03:05 am UTC (link)
	I know. It's alright. I know I'm not him, but I don't think he would've told me everything he did if he didn't think you could trust me. I understand if you don't believe that, in light of what I know now (from what he told me), but if you need someone to believe you, I promise that I will. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	Order, plus James lostnowfound 2009-08-05 01:01 pm UTC (link)
	Could you send me a copy of his last wishes, James? Whether or not I need to aid you with them, I would like to know. I can't believe he wrote letters. I- Of course he would want a party. Oh, Sirius. James: I assume you received an owl as well, then. When was yours written? Was it sometime after you were taken to the centre, or before then? (Reply to this) (Thread)

Andromeda.

jamesopotter
2009-08-05 01:37 pm UTC (link)

He wrote part of the letter before I was taken, but he wrote part of it after and he said even though he knew I'd changed, he still wanted me to take care of everything. Best friends to the end and all that. I'll let you read that parts of his last wishes that aren't too private to just me.

1. Assuming there’s enough of me left - not sure what they did with Benjys bits, do you reckon someone has his head mounted somewhere? - I don’t want to be buried. You know I don’t like enclosed spaces. I want ashes. I don’t care what happens to the ashes, as long as you spread them somewhere. Do not keep them. Do not just leave them somewhere and forget. I am not your wand.

2. I don’t want a funeral. I mean it, James. I don’t want anyone more than the guys seeing me. Not even that if you can help it. I don’t want people getting upset and staining their journals and what have you. I won’t be the cause of any more upset. Have a party and talk about how great things were instead. I’ve had a great life. People should remember that.

4. Take care of Shadow. That bike means the fucking world to me and I won’t have people messing with her just cause I’m dead. If your sons/daughters want her, they can have her.

7. Musical arrangements…Children of the Revolution. Good ol’ T-Rex, just like my seventeenth. Except this time, hopefully, I’ll have my trousers up!

Please make them give him to me Andie. It's what he wanted. You know I wouldn't make this up.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

James

lostnowfound
2009-08-05 02:19 pm UTC (link)

I apologize, give me one moment, dear.

As much as he liked to think he was nothing to get upset over, he was. We're going to be upset, but perhaps we'll be in the mood for a party after some time. I hope he would understand that- after Ted- it's healthy to grieve, but I understand him not wanting us to dwell.

Have you given any thought to where you might spread his ashes?

I will try, James. I understand, darling, it may take them a little more time, but I have hope they will do as he wished. For both of you.

(Reply to this) (Parent)