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[Aug. 31st, 2009|04:40 pm] |
Private to Order Members.
Peter is gone.
Private to Peter.
Is this another betrayal? Because really Pete, I think I deserve one fucking break in this entire fucking war. I get the you wanted to go. But I'd have helped you leave. Why'd you have to go and sneak away? Why couldn't you be honest with me?
I thought we were still friends. |
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[Aug. 24th, 2009|02:43 pm] |
Pete, I'm looking for you.
Lils.
Is Harry too little to smile? I was holding him and I could've sworn he smiled in his sleep. Must've been thinking about dinner or something. I know if my dinner came in such lovely containers I'd smile to think about it too.
Order Folks.
Where is Remus's body? Traitor or not, he was my best friend once upon a time, and I'm going to respect his last wishes.
Also, Pete needs a wand and a new journal. I think he's afraid to really ask for them at this point. I think I can scrounge him up a journal but have you lot decided about if he can have a wand yet, and if so, are there any extras? I know you don't trust him (or me either for that matter) but it's shit to keep a wizard from magic. It's what they were doing at the rehab centre and that's how they break people. I'm sure somehow a restricted wand could be managed at the very least.
Gaius.
Wanted to send my regrets about the Centre. How are you going to get off now, if you don't have any arms to break?
Pads.
Spent your birthday alone. You made me break my promise, twat. You'd better have spent the whole damn day stuck to my side. |
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[Aug. 15th, 2009|12:04 pm] |
Warded to the Lily.
We need to talk. Really talk. I'm so sorry love. I am so sorry. It was like... a switch or something that had been flipped. I know I shouldn't have run off as soon as we got to Andie's but I needed to beat the shit out of Gaius to see that I was fixed. And I realized that I am.
I'm at that old house on my parent's property that we never used. It's well warded but if you want to come back to Andie's I will. I left-- I dropped Sirius's ashes in the field trying to get to you, and I lost my dad's pocket watch too. Thought about going to try and find them but I don't want to be stupid. I never want to lose you again.
And I want to hold Harry. I can't believe we have a son.
Private to the Order minus Remus.
I know that no one's going to trust me anytime soon, but I'm back, I swear. I can't even begin to say how sorry I am, but I will swear it on my life that I never game them any names or information. Right now I'll stay away from everyone till we can figure out some way to make sure I'm harmless. You can give me veritaserum if you want or anything.
I've got information though I'd like to get passed around. I know the rehabilitation centre in and out, and my uncle's house as well. Whatever I can help with, let me know, and for fuck's sake it needs to be said... I've missed being me.
Private to Severus.
I'm out.
Private to Sirius.
I lost your ashes. If they aren't floating around in the wind somehow I'll figure out a way to get them back.
I miss you. But I'm better now, and I think that's probably what you'd have really wanted. Wish you could be here. |
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[Aug. 10th, 2009|11:10 am] |
Private to Severus and Gaius.
I want to practice dueling tonight. I think I can finally manage it properly. Uncle Charlus is going to work with me this afternoon but I want to hold on to this feeling. Hell, if you're both busy I'll ask Demetrius or Lestrange. The less dead one obviously. Anyone.
I want to hurt something. |
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[Aug. 5th, 2009|01:02 pm] |
It's hard to believe it's August. Where does the time go?
Private to Pads.
I'm doing something I think you'd like. I'm doing it for you really. I know you're watching. Sometimes I feel like you're right hear next to me, and though that'd be a little pervy considering what I did before breakfast in the shower, the rest of the time it's nice. Anyway-- back to what you'll like.
You remember that second house my parents had in Godric's Hollow? The one I talked about fixing up last year before the first one got burnt down. I'm moving in. I haven't told Uncle Charlus or Gaius or anyone but you. I'm going to go look at it this afternoon, but it was where my dad's dad was born and it's been completely warded up for years but I went in once with dad when I was about twelve and it still had furniture and things. It's old and it smelled like Grimmauld Place but I can't go back to the Order and I feel like, just in case you were right, I need a place for myself. Somewhere to go and hide or think or live if I have to.
It's got a nice big shed for Shadow and well-- it's in Godric's Hollow which is where Potters belong. I plan on going to get her late tonight, and no worries, I'll take good care of her.
Private to Gaius.
Thank you for letting me see Peter last night, and thanks again for the Snitch. It's been a rough few days but I'm finally feeling better. Did the funeral go alright? Uncle Charlus seemed really cranky this morning during my lessons. I couldn't make a crucio work and he ended up using one on a house elf to prove a point.
Private to Lily.
How's Harry? |
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[Aug. 4th, 2009|08:08 pm] |
Private to Sirius.
You just couldn't leave well enough alone you big twat. I cam home from seeing Harry, cutest little bugger on the planet, and get your damned letter and now I'm sobbing like a third year whose just lost her virginity to Sirius Black and found out he doesn't really love her and only said it to get in her panties, and what the fuck am I supposed to do now?
What do you want from me Pads? Remus took me in! I know something is going on. But you were right about so much and you're my best friend and you always will be, and I believe you and I don't know what to think.
This would be so much easier if you were here. Why did you have to leave me?
Private to the Order.
I don't want to do this but Sirius was my best friend and so I am fulfilling his last wishes. So I need to ask you for his body. If you don't trust me with his body then it should go to Andie and she can take care of the first part of this. He wanted to be cremated and then he wanted me to have his ashes and spread them.
I loved him like a brother, I would never do anything to dishonour his memory. Please let me do this without picking any fights.
Also, he doesn't want a funeral, he wants a party. And obviously, I doubt I'll be invited but I can owl money for alcohol if you need it. He also wants this music played:
Children of the Revolution. Good ol’ T-Rex
Last, he wanted me to have Shadow. I want it for now but it's going to go to Harry when he gets old enough to ride without killing himself. I think that's all. |
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[Aug. 3rd, 2009|09:40 am] |
Private to Sirius.
Something was bothering me all last night, Pads, and I couldn't put my finger on it. Grief I guess will do that to you. But here it is, my first thought of the morning.
Friends don't lie to each other and I don't know if Gaius is lying to me or not. It can't be good though if he starts thinking that I'm off my rocker. I need to figure out the truth for myself. You would never lie to me and yesterday, I meant it. I believe in you. If you've got time up on that cloud between harassing Reggie and shagging Agnes, watch out for me, will ya?
I can't believe you're gone.
Private to Gaius.
I am sorry that I was so rude last night. Daylight has made everything much more clear. No more outbursts from me. If you find out anything I'd like to know, if you don't mind telling me.
Private to Lily.
I still want to see Harry. I need to see him. |
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[Aug. 2nd, 2009|10:48 pm] |
Lily.
I can't do this. |
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[Aug. 2nd, 2009|09:30 pm] |
Gaius.
Who did it? Do you know who did it? Please tell me. I won't do anything stupid I swear, I just need to know. Please.
Severus.
Who did it? Do you know who did it? |
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[Aug. 1st, 2009|10:06 pm] |
Sirius.
I love you.
Severus.
I might love you.
Gaius.
I have questions but maybe I should wait till done being drunk to ask them. They not are sex related so you can still sleeptonight. |
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[Jul. 31st, 2009|04:37 pm] |
I think I need a new pair of glasses. These ones won't sit straight on my face anymore.
Private to Gaius.
I'm not trying to be ridiculous, I have an honest question I can't ask anyone else. Is it bad that I'm not particularly sad about Rodolphus Lestrange? I mean, I'm pretty sure he tried to kill me at least once. Him or his French son.
For uncle Charlus's sake I'm being very discrete because he's upset, but no one's gonna try to make me go to the funeral are they?
Private to Sirius.
Lestrange? How in fuck did anyone manage that???
Also, the mirror? BRILL! |
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[Jul. 29th, 2009|12:17 am] |
Private to Gaius.
I'm bleeding again, and since Uncle Charlus feels it's a good idea to let INSANE PEOPLE in this house at any hour of the night I want to leave. He said if you would find a place for me I could go somewhere for the night.
Old people never want to argue after eleven. |
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[Jul. 28th, 2009|11:35 pm] |
Warded to Remus, Bellatrix and Charlus Potter.
Remus you have to give him back. Please. They're going to kill people. kids. orphans.
You HAVE to give him back. |
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[Jul. 28th, 2009|09:07 pm] |
I'm hungry but nothing sounds good. I'm bored but Uncle Charlus is busy. Why don't elves know how to play Wizarding Chess?
Sirius.
Which of the unforgivables do you think is the most forgivable? |
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[Jul. 27th, 2009|12:40 pm] |
I've been given my old wand back and it's absolutely brilliant to be able to do all the magic I'd been missing for the last seven weeks! I spent all morning apparating from one spot to the other and then mum and I went to breakfast at a very nice restaurant and stopped at Gringotts to make adjustments to my vault.
Warded Private to Gaius:
Thanks again for the wand. Uncle Charlus seems to think I need work at offensive spell casting but he doesn't have much patience for how lousy I am at much over a blasting spell. I've never really-- I mean you know how I felt about unforgivables, and I'm still not so sure about them, but he wants me to at least be able to
Private to Severus:
Uncle Charlus seems to think I need work at offensive spell casting but he doesn't have much patience for how lousy I am at more than a blasting spell. You know how I felt about unforgivables, and I'm still not so sure about them, but he wants me to at least be able to
Nevermind.
Private to Sirius:
Hello. |
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[Jul. 23rd, 2009|10:54 am] |
Private to Sirius.
Good morning.
Private to Snape.
Lily keeps pushing to see me and I haven't given her an answer yet. I asked Gaius about it and he said it's my decision but if I see her that he'd like to know.
I guess I'm asking you because you know her about as well as I do, maybe better. Do you think this is a trap so they can grab me and try and fix me, or does she just want to... I don't know... see for herself that I've changed? Because if that's all it is, I don't really mind. Maybe it'll get her to hurry the fuck up and agree to an annulment so it doesn't drag on. |
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[Jul. 21st, 2009|07:24 pm] |
Warded to Gaius.
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[Jul. 17th, 2009|03:19 pm] |
Private to Self.
She's dead. Sirius wouldn't have lied about that, and if there'd been any question in his mind he'd have brought it up. I should have been paying closer attention to what I've been reading. But it makes sense.
Why would Rodolphus Lestrange kill Marly but leave Remus unless she wasn't in on it? Maybe she found out?
It'd work. She was there. That's why I suspected her. But what if she wasn't IN on it? She was there, and then Remus left and I didn't come back. She suspected something was wrong and she was going to tell someone... and he killed her. Or he had her killed. And now he looks like the grieving widower and no one is looking at him. Sirius even said it... I needed to lay off because he was upset. He's playing him.
And fuck it, because Marlene didn't betray me. She wouldn't have. I was right. But then she's dead and it doesn't change that.
( Private to Marlene. ) |
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[Jul. 16th, 2009|09:56 am] |
It's fucking amazing how many different things you can have for breakfast all at once when you've got a house elf willing to make them all. I had bacon, sausage, kippers, a boiled egg, a fried egg, toast, some cheese thing that smelled like cat but tasted very good, oats, and some leftover chocolate cake because I'd asked them to make me one last night.
And the house elves love me because I eat it all and I say thank you and I tried to clear my own dishes the other day which had them laughing for hours. Mum and Dad were always against house elves but I think this is just another area where they may have gotten it wrong. Telly is aces.
Severus Snape.
Uncle C told me about your house this morning when I woke up. I can't say I'm sorry to hear it burnt down because from everything I knew and saw about that house it was mostly fucking miserable. Still, from having my own home burnt to the ground, I know what shit it is to see your childhood go up in smoke. I hope you were able to retrieve anything important.
Sirius.
Come see me. Come see me. Come see me. Come see me. Come see me. Come see me. Come see me. Comesee me comeseeme. comeeeeeeeee seeeeeeeee meeeeeeee. |
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[Jul. 13th, 2009|08:13 pm] |
I have left the Rehabilitation Centre. My uncle has been kind enough to take me in, but I'll still be going back every day for check-ins and such. And to volunteer. I know a lot of people think I've lost my snitch and all that, but I haven't. It was good for me and I want to help it be good for other people too.
I've got a wand, too, and I can ward to all purebloods and the people Gaius thought would be appropriate. I'm not going to list everyone out but if you ward and I see it I'll write back. Otherwise it's best if we keep it public for now. If everything goes well I'll only have restrictions for another month or so.
Warded to Atticus Avery
Sir, would you be willing to meet with me at my uncle Charlus's home? I have a legal thingy that he suggested you might be able to help with. An annulment to be exact. I've been reading up on it a bit myself with some of the books from the centre and it seems like if it goes to trial and she doesn't show up it would automatically be granted. Do you know if that's true?
Warded to Sirius Black
Look! Wards! S'fucking brilliant!
Warded to Gaius Travers
Uncle Charlus bought me a fucking STELLAR broom but I've got no one to fly with yet. Would you like to come over tonight? I could ask the elves to bake a pie. I have an elf all of my own. |
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